Doorways and Starlight – A Poem

I woke indoorway.light_

darkness. I got

out of bed

and walked toward

a rectangle of

light that shone

in the distance.

I knew that

if I opened

the door, there

would be brightness

to chase away

the dark. I

opened the door

and stepped through

the doorway. I

found myself in

a place I

used to know.

I had called

it home, though

towards the end,

it did not

fill me with

a feeling of

peace as homes

are supposed to

do. The walls

of places we

have known retain

voices of the

past, vibrations of

sound lost in

concrete and plaster.

I put my

hand on one

of the walls

and felt the

sadness there, the

turmoil. I took

my hand away

and looked at

my palm. It

was red, as

if it had

been burned. I

ran towards another

doorway and stepped

through it. I

found myself in

another place I

had called home

but it had

just been another

way station. The

walls here looked

as if they

were crying, thick

tears like wax

were seeping out

of the walls.

If the previous

place had held

sound, this one

held emotion. I

had tried to

find myself here

but to no

avail. I had

only found heartache.

I went to

the doorway to

the sun-room and

could see the

sky shining through

the cracks. I

opened the door

and stepped through

it. I was

inside my dark

basement apartment. I

had known despair

here, heartache and

disaster. However, oddly

enough, I had

found myself here,

had realized what

I was truly

capable of inside

these walls. In

the darkest part

of my life,

I had found

myself. I stepped

forward and placed

my hand on

the rough walls.

Instead of emotion

or sound, I

saw myself as

I had been.

I lay in

my bed, the

stories I longed

to tell brought

to life above

me as if

they were dreams

given life. I

could see characters

I had created

living out their

destinies and I

lay there, powerless

to stop the

story from going

forward. I watched

as I found

the strength to

learn to walk

once more, the

will to move

forward, the courage

to continue. It

was here that,

instead of giving

up, as I

had been tempted

to do, I

chose to live

instead. If the

previous places had

held sound and

emotion, this one

housed my strength

until I was

strong enough to

accept it. I could

hear music, a

soft kaleidoscope of

notes coming from

another doorway. I

stepped through it

eager to leave

the darkness behind.

I opened the

door into the

hallway and stepped

through into light.

I was in

my current place,

the first one

that felt like

home instead of

just a place

to exist. However,

the music wasn’t

coming from here.

These walls were

bathed in light,

but the music

came from somewhere

further on. I

felt as if

I was standing

on a precipice

as I stood

front of the doorway

of my apartment.

This place held

light within its

walls. I wondered

what would come

next? I reached

out a hand

and opened the

door. I heard

the kaleidoscope of

music, louder this

time, but could

see only stars.

I stood at

the doorway wondering

what to do,

when I heard

his lovely voice.

“You’re perfect for me. You complete me. I love you.”

The music around

me swelled to

a loud crescendo

and I stepped

through the doorway

and into starlight,

waiting to feel

his arms around

me. As I

fell through the

stars, I marveled

at the fact

that it had

taken finding myself

to find the

other half of

my heart.

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