Clouds and Spirit Wind – A Poem

My mind is

full of clouds

and my spirit

is the wind.

The clouds are

shaped like you.

I can see

the outline of

your chin, the

strong set of

your jaw, it’s

disapproving frown seeming

to mock me

as it did

so many times

before. Lately, I’ve

started to forget

you. The timbre

of your voice

when you got

angry, the colour

of your eyes.

What your middle

name was or

your birthday. Those

details ceased to

matter, though I

thought they would

be burned into

my mind forever.

The more I

forgot, the more

I was able

to let go.

As I look

at the clouds

inside my head,

they begin to

disassemble, the wind

of my spirit

growing ever stronger,

a storm without

lightening. I watch

the growing breeze

and wonder why

what you thought

of me mattered

so much, why

I’ve carried pieces

of you around

with me like

a hair shirt

made of needles.

Why I’ve based

my self-worth on

someone who isn’t

worth anything to

me anymore; who

didn’t treat me

like I was

worth anything at

all except a

convenience. I stare

at the clouds

as they continue

to shift and

watch as the

outline of your

face begins to

disappear, the shape

of your brow

begins to lessen.

Thunder from the

clouds that make

your shape and

form let out

a rumble of

thunder and there

is a streak

lightning in my

head that flashes

sharp like a

knife. I take

a deep breath.

“I let you go.”

I whisper softly.

“As I forget you, I let you go.”

My spirit grew

brighter than a

star, shining brilliantly

upon the clouds.

It began to

gather force, creating

its own wind

to push away

the gathering storm.

The spirit wind

ran at the

growing mass of

darkness and pushed

the clouds away,

forced them to

break apart until

there was nothing

left but smoke

and vapour. I

looked up at

the bright blue

sky within me

and my entire

body felt full

of the light

that had always

been within me.

“I’ve let you go.”

I said and

took comfort from

how free of

clouds the sky

was.