The Wisdom of Trees – A Poem

I was diagnosed with relapse and remitting multiple sclerosis twelve years ago today.

I’ve been trying to think of what this means to me. Living with a chronic illness on top of a physical disability has not been an easy road, but it’s one that I’m proud of. I’ve survived so much, and I’ve been able to experience the world in ways I never thought were possible.

Normally, I would sit and write out a blog post about what this means to me and maybe reflect on what I have learned in twelve years. Instead, this poem is what wanted to come out. I hope you enjoy it.  

The Wisdom of the Trees

I remember the day my life changed for the second time.

My body had been so familiar to me until the

unseen force from within took

everything.

I remember sitting there in the shadows, waiting for the

crows as the trees whispered. I remember praying

that the doctors would be wrong,

that they had made a mistake.

I remember the doctor, sitting across from me,

his kind face a bright beacon as the shadows

threatened to close in and I desperately

wanted them to.

“You won the multiple sclerosis lottery,” he said kindly,

as if this was supposed to make me feel better.

“Relapse and remitting?” I asked him.

“That means it will go away?”

In the twelve years that I have been on this long path,

there is so much that I have learned about who

I really am and what I’m truly

capable of.

Sometimes, I will look at the forest that I carry

in hopes that the trees will contain some

kind of wisdom as I look at the path

that winds ahead.

I’ve had to lean to grow differently,

my vines reaching for the dark and

the light. Twelve years I’ve carried this

other being inside my bloodstream and while it has

taken everything from me, it has also given me more

than I ever thought possible.