Jamieson Wolf
Number-one bestselling author
A Photograph on the Tree of Life – A Poem
I pull a photograph of you
from an album and I take in the shape
of your smile,
the brightness in your eyes.
Looking at your face now,
I realize that I had no idea
our paths would diverge
like tree branches.
Though we were both made
from the Tree of Life,
our branches grew in different directions.
It took me a while to realize this.
I watched as we grew together,
then grew apart,
our branches afraid to touch.
The photograph of you would fade
a little bit at a time
the further we grew apart.
I didn’t notice it at first,
however, it’s undeniable now.
As I take in the shape
of this memory caught in time,
I know that I must put the picture away
before you disappear entirely from the picture.
I don’t want you to be gone from my memory,
but instead held safe so that I can remember
the positive impact you had on my life
while you were in it.
I tuck the photo back into the album
and place the book into a drawer
that holds my most precious memories.
Maybe when I look at the photo again,
your smile will still be there
to lead me out to the garden
where a new tree will have started
to grow.
You Have My Heart – A Poem
Many years ago, I gave you my heart.
It was battered and there were scars
that ran across its surface.
It didn’t like to be touched and there were
staples, tape and elastic bands
holding it together after being broken
so many times before.
You took my heart gently and promised
to honour me by keeping it safe.
Over time, you removed each piece of tape,
every staple and each elastic band.
Every time you told me you loved me,
a staple would fall away.
When you said that I was beautiful,
an elastic band would snap and fall away.
One night, I watched as you plucked each staple
from my heart and you kissed each wound
so that it would it close.
Piece by piece, you removed the tape,
making sure to promise my heart
that it would want for nothing.
When I asked you why my heart wasn’t broken
with nothing to hold it together,
you showed me that you’ve been holding it,
held gently in your hands
like a talisman or a touchstone
since I gave my heart to you all those years ago.
It should have fallen apart,
but under your care my heart has grown,
filled with the love that you have given it.
You have sustained my heart and my spirit,
helping to make them shine bright again
through your support and love.
More, you have made me realize
what love really is and I am so lucky
that I get to fall in love with you again
as every day begins.
Finite and Made of Stars – A Poem
I’m not afraid.
As I look at the mountain in front of me,
I know that I’m not ready,
but I will have to be.
As I look at the ravine that I must cross,
I know that no sane person would dare try,
but I will have to.
As I look at the road covered in flames,
I know that the fire will tear into my skin,
but I must cross.
As I look at the dark forest that blocks my path,
I know that there are horrors to be found within,
but I must go through.
I’m not afraid,
I know that with certainty,
but I also know that the human body is
finite and made of stars.
An Imboc Seed – A Poem
There is a light
that is growing within me.
It comes from a seed I planted there,
inside the caverns of my skin
and the mountains of my mind.
I can feel the warmth from
the warm glow starting to find
all of the nooks and crannies
of my body,
the deep and barren parts of me,
My fingers ache to feel the light
tingling in their tips.
I pull my hands into fists,
then release my fingers
so that it looks as if they are growing
from soil of my bones.
Finding Balance – A Memoir
I’ve accidentally started a new memoir.
Some things never change, not really. I recently made a decision for myself, and it was the best decision I could have made, but it left scars as these things do. That decision had everything to do with my words, so I had to take time to heal.
The words were coming, but I had no idea what I wanted write. What idea would hold my interest. At first, I wrote chapters and poems, but then the need for a bigger story came. I just didn’t know what I would write about.
I’m not sure where the idea to write about my time on the streets and off again paired with a tarot deck came from, but something within me clicked. I thought it would be neat to try it. I knew that the chapters would be short. There would be no editing, aside from basic obvious stuff. I would try, within reason, to write every day.
I would be writing again. I so wanted to write again. More than that, I wanted the writing to heal my a little and to be fun. It’s been so long since I’ve had fun writing. With all of that together, it just clicked. That’s what I’m calling Finding Balance.
That’s a working title for now. I’m posting these chapters over on my tarot blog Spirit of the Wolf Tarot. When I thought of somewhere to post these chapters, my blog seemed the perfect spot, since the memoir would be tarot related.
You can find all the chapters so far here: https://spirit-of-the-wolf.com/category/a-tarot-guide/
If you read it, I really hope you enjoy it. There are more chapters on the way.
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Jamieson Wolf has written a compelling story about navigating multiple sclerosis and cerebral palsy. His story will touch your heart, make you cry, then laugh, and inspire you. A touching memoir with a bit of magic…and tarot! ~ Theresa Reed, author of The Tarot Coloring Book
Jamieson Wolf 