Number-one bestselling author
I thought I
would feel sadness
or discontent. I
thought I would
be depressed or
sad that part
of my life
had ended here.
However, all I
experienced was a
sense of rightness,
the thrum of
gratification running though
my veins. I’m
not sure, but
I was probably
glowing. I got
the papers stamped
and paid my
fee. I expected
to feel sadness
but there was
only this overwhelming
sense of relief.
Too long I
have waited to
feel something other
than resentment or
despair when I
thought of him.
Now I was
filled only with
joy and peace
of my own making.
It was only
the first step,
but it is
that first step
that is the
most difficult,
the most frightening.
The first step
looks down from
a cliff, high
up in the
air. I had
two choices. I
could cower at
the top of
that cliff as
I had done
for years, or
I could take
the leap of
faith and trust
that my wings
would save me.
Instead of waiting
for him to
do the right
thing, I did
it myself. I
took the power
away from him
and made it my own.
My life is
mine to live
and I choose
to live it,
to embrace it,
whatever it may
bring. It is
the beginning of
goodbye for us,
but I’m so
much better without
him and will
be even better
when I’m not
carrying the shards
of what was
around with me.
Instead of carrying
those shards of
a chalice always
with me, I
take those shards
and fashion something
from them so
that rather than
cause me pain,
instead they capture
the sun, shining
light upon all
in my life
that is beautiful.