Number-one bestselling author
She got on
to the elevator.
When she saw
me, her smile
brightened and her
whole body shone.
“Hi!”
She said, excitedly.
“How are you? I haven’t seen you in forever!”
I looked through
my memory, the
albums of memories
that are there.
I flipped through
the place I
thought she should
be, but the
page was blank,
with nothing on it
except the words
MEMORY MISSING
written in bold
red type. I
closed the album
within my head
and looked at
her, hoping that
my smile was
convincing enough. I
offered her pleasantries
and asked if
she had vacation
planned. I didn’t
ask anything personal
because I could
remember nothing about
her, not her
name, not where
I knew her
from, not even
how long I
knew her. Inside
my head, I
opened the memory
book and placed
a photo of
her, so that
it would be
there next time.
When the disease
hit, it left
me with a
battle to fight
within my own
body. It also
took something from
me. My memories.
I used to
be able to
quote from movies
on queue, remember
the plot and
title of every
book I’ve ever
read, every place
I’ve been to,
songs I used
to know by
heart. Now, all
those memory books
are filled with
blank pages, blank
faces, empty places.
After the heaviness
left me, and
I took up
the fight, my
focus was on
getting better. As
I started that
battle, I started
to realise how
quiet it was
inside my head.
I took a
look inside myself
at the boxes
filled with memory
books, pictures and
pieces of paper,
memories preserved for
later reference. I
was shocked to
find an almost
empty room instead
of a warehouse
filled to the
brim. Now there
was only one
room filled with
a handful of
boxes. As I
started to go
through the boxes,
I kept seeing
MEMORY MISSING
where a memory
once resided, its
page left with
a vague outline
of whatever had
been there before,
a shadow of
what it use
to be. At
first, this worried
me and I kept
thinking that my
boxes would never
be full again.
I lamented that
which I had
forgotten. Eventually, I
realized that, in
a way, it
was a blessing,
that everything that
had been forgotten
could be filled
with a new memory,
and that everything
I had forgotten
could be new
all over again.
I realized that
new albums could
be made and
that life didn’t
have to be
spent lamenting what
I had forgotten.
That the past
was the past
and all I
had to do
was focus on
the future. I
turned to the
woman in the
elevator and asked
“I’m sorry, but could you tell me your name again?”