The Blue Scarf – A Poem

When I was seventeen,

she gave me what was to be

one of my most cherished gifts.

I remember the warm twinkle of Christmas lights,

the crinkle of the wrapping paper,

how what was hiding within

felt soft and malleable.

I tore open the paper to reveal

the loveliest knit scarf

in two different shades of blue.

“Now, you see the stripes on the ends of the scarf, Jamie?”

I looked at them and nodded.

“You’ll notice I made them a little different.”

I took a closer look and saw that she was right.

They went: small, small, bigger on one side

and small, bigger, biggest on the other.

I ran my fingers along these stripes,

imagining them like musical notes.

“I made them different because you’re a little different.”

From her, I knew that this was

a compliment and high praise indeed.

She had always encouraged my differences

and made me want to celebrate them.

I was never ashamed to be me.

Throughout the next twenty-three years,

I wore the scarf every winter.

It kept me warm against the cold,

helped me feel safe when I needed safety

and was part armor, part blanket, part hug.

I remember her telling me:

“Be yourself, everyone else is taken.”

She was a constant source of wisdom.

The scarf followed me through everything

that I have lived through.

Every winter, it would greet me

as if it were an old friend

and it was always a small joy

when the weather got cold

because I would be able

to wear it again and see

my cherished friend once more.

I said goodbye to you today.

As I put the scarf on before saying goodbye,

I ran my fingers over those dark blue stripes

and imagined what kind of tune

my blue scarf would play.

For twenty-three years,

the blue scarf has been a piece of you

that I carry with me.

Now, whenever I put the scarf on,

I will picture you taking hold of my hand

and walking beside me over the ice and the snow,

perhaps running your fingers along the dark blue lines

and singing a little tune.

Now, whenever I wear the blue scarf,

I will be reminded that,

even though your body may be gone,

your spirit lives on in all who knew you.

You are with all of us,

everyone who loves you,

and our lives are

all the better for it.