Choose to Live – A Poem

I was done.10404376_790489011033216_9126575568745857468_n

I sat there,

a stranger inside

my own body.

I had a choice

but I didn’t

know how to

make it. I

didn’t know. I

was lost within

myself and what

I had become.

It was as

if my body

had become a

labyrinth and I

had no way

of knowing how

to find the

exit. The forest

was there, the

trees lush and

green inside my

apartment. They were

beautiful but I

knew the trees

deadly. Their leaves

were tinged in

blood. I ignored

them and the

whisper of their

call, turned away

from the lure

of the darkness

that I could

lose myself in.

Everything was finished

and I had nothing.

“That’s not true, though, is it?”

A small voice

spoke from the

trees. I looked

up into the

leaves and saw

a bright eyed

owl. It regarded

me with eyes

that shone like

gold. I shook

my head to

clear my vision.

The trees and

the owl remained.

“How can you hear my thoughts?”

The owl ruffled

it’s feathers and

regarded me with

a wise stare.

“How can I not when you think so loudly? How long has it been since you’ve been out of this apartment?”

I shook my head.

“I don’t know. I go out for work.”

“But when was the last time you went out to simply live?”

I didn’t want

to answer its

questions so I

asked it one

of my own.

“How can you come from the dark forest? There isn’t anything beautiful in there.”

The owl laughed,

making a soft

hooting noise that

was like music.

“Oh, you know the forest so well do you? You know only the shadows of the trees, not the beauty that lies within. For even in darkness, there must be balance.”

I shook my

head, so sure

that I knew

more than the owl.

“The forest is only darkness. That’s all it has ever been.”

“Yes, but darkness comes from the absence of light.”

“What does that mean?”

“If it’s darkness that has you down, make light to chase away the shadows.”

“I’ve forgotten how. I’m too far inside the labyrinth and can’t find my way out.”

The owl ruffled

her feathers and

blinked her eyes

at me in

with impatience. She

flew down off

of the branch

and perched on

my leg. She

moved forward and

pecked at my

chest with her beak.

“It’s dark inside your mind, but not in here, where your heart is. You want light? Look there. Follow the light of your heart out of the labyrinth.”

“It’s not that easy.”

“Of course it’s not. Some choices in life are hard. However, it’s the ones that are hardest to make that give us the biggest reward.”

“So what choice do I make? I don’t know what to do!”

“Sure you do. You can either give up and accept things as they are, or you can choose to live and embrace life. The choice is yours.”

I thought about

what she had

said and what

I really wanted.

I knew that

this was no

life. I was

living as if

I had already

died. I closed

my eyes and

tried to see

the light at

the end of

the labyrinth, leading

me to freedom.

As soon as

I made the

choice to look

for the light,

I saw it.

I don’t know

why I hadn’t

seen it before,

perhaps because I

didn’t want to

see it. I raced

towards it, the

twists and turns

of the labyrinth

falling away as

I figured my

way through its

twists and turns.

When I got

to the exit,

the light was

waiting for me,

bright and beautiful

and full of

warmth. I stepped

into it and

raised my face

to it, letting

it cleanse away

the darkness.

“I choose to live.”

I whispered softly.

“I choose to live!”

I yelled this,

made it a declaration

of purpose, intent

and meaning. I

breathed in

the sunlight. It

filled me with

warmth that stretched

to every corner

and curve of

my body. When

I opened my

eyes, it was

to find that

the forest and

the owl were

both gone. All

that remained was

one feather. Written

on its plumage

was one word.

Live.

Triku – A Poem

When I think of joy, index
your face comes to mind, fully
formed and beautiful

When I think of bliss,
I think of sleeping beside
you, safe, whole, content.

When I think of you,
I can’t imagine my life
without you in it.

A Scribes Wish Granted – A Short Story

8ed84f9a288add7875b798c3573e9c79Once upon a time, in the village of Inglewood Hamlet, there lived scribe.

He would tell tales bigger and wider than the impassable sands that bordered the Eastern side of the kingdom. He would spin tales of love that could fill the waters that bordered the Western side of the kingdom. He would write with his quill and paper well into the night, until his candles had burned down to stubs.

Many asked him how he wrote such moving tales of love. Surely there must be an inspiration? He would smile politely and thank them for their compliments, but would say he didn’t know where the inspiration came from.

The truth was, he wrote about what he wished for. There were a few times he thought he had found love, but it was of the darker variety. It would start out light and beautiful like a flower come to bloom, but every time it would end the same way, as if it were a flower with thorns that would make him bleed the tighter he held onto it.

So the Scribe let go of the dream of ever finding love, the other half of him. It was simply the way it had to be. He spent his days watching his friends fall in love and build lives with others. He could see the trees that they had planted together taking root in the ground and growing into gorgeous trees full of leaves. They could not see the trees, but he could. It was part of the Scribe’s curse, seeing that which others could not see.

When the whispering of the leaves became too much for him, he took himself to the furthest point into the Eastern border, deep into the sands that made up the desert. He built himself a small hut. He didn’t need any more space than that; space enough to sleep, eat and write. He lived only for his words now.

On his seventh night in the hut, away from civilization, he received a visitor.

He heard the sound of bells, playing a delightful tune that made him want to get up and dance to their tune. She always arrived this way. He remained sitting and put down his quill. A light began to shine in the middle of his hut and soon, it grew brighter, more vibrant. The light began to hum along with the sound of the bells and, with a small pop, she stood before him.

Her wings didn’t have much room to flutter in the small hut, so she kept them close to her back. Looking around at his living quarters, she huffed out a small sigh that sounded like wind flowing through leaves. “Well, I can see why you moved here, Jaxon. This is so spacious and lovely, it just takes my breath away.”

Jaxon let out a breath. “Good day, Suzanne. To what do I owe this pleasure?”

“Is that any way to greet your mother?” She smiled and moved closer. “Come give me a hug.”

He stood and did so, holding his mother in his arms. She was so much smaller than he was. Though she was Fey and had the smaller stature like all her kind, he knew she possessed the heart of a lion. When he went to pull away, she held on for one last squeeze and his body was filled with light.

Like all Fey, she had magic. Hers was the gift of light and wisdom. Her touch always brought light in the darkness and made your mind clear when it was clouded. To some, this was not a great gift, but Jaxon knew it for the power it was. She had inspired many an artist, helped many law makers in the land make sound decisions and had brought light to people most in need.

Now, she gave him the look he knew so well. “I’m worried about you, Jaxon. Why do you hide yourself away like this? To what purpose?”

“You wouldn’t understand.”

“Oh, I’ve lived for hundreds of years and have seen more than you can begin to dream of. Really, why do you live like this? You came from magic and have magic all your own, with words that bring dreams to so many. Why do you hide away as if you are nothing?”

“It’s easier that way. I won’t get hurt that way.”

“You are hurting yourself. Do you not want to find love?”

“I do, but it isn’t for me. I’ve tried.”

“Then try again. You have to be open to love for love to find you. When was the last time you went on an outing? Almost a year ago now?”

“Sounds about right.”

“You write of the love you wish for, the love you desire, yet you hide yourself away where you cannot possibly meet any man you desire. Is there no one in Inglewood that has shown you some interest?”

Jaxon fiddled with his quill. “Well, there is one man. A man at the money lenders who I’ve spoken to through letters. His last few missives have become more open and honest.”

“Well, if he’s shown you interest, than perhaps you need to show some back.”

“I wouldn’t know where to begin.”

“It’s quite simple, people have been uttering this magical words for eons now.”

“What word is that?”

“Hello. It all begins with hello. The story blooms from there. When do you next go into town?”

“This afternoon. I’m almost out of ink and could use a new quill.”

“Fabulous. Then we have time.”

“Time for what?”

“To clean you up.”

“I look fine.”

His mother let out a small laugh. “I mean no disrespect Jaxon, but you look as if you’ve rolled with the pigs. You smell like it, too.”

She waved her hands and the little hut he lived in was filled with light once more. However, this time he was the source of the light. He was filled with warmth and heat and every part of him hummed with magic. When it faded, he looked down at himself.

His ratty trousers were new and made of a thick weave of cotton coloured in grey. His shirt was new too, and made of a finer weave than his trousers. He even wore a little vest that was coloured in shades of gold and silver.

“I don’t look like me.”

“Yes, you do. You look like everyone else sees you now. Your magic, Jaxon, it’s time you started acting like it. Now, did you need a lift to town?”

“No, that’s quite all right, I-”

Suzanne snapped her fingers and he was standing in front of the money lenders, quick as a flash. He really hated it when she did that. He had his bag slung over his shoulder, filled with his inkwells. He stood there in front of the money lenders, not sure what to do.

Wanting to gather courage, instead of going in the money lenders, he went to a small pub that served some elixirs and foodstuffs. As his eyes adjusted to the darkness of the pub, he saw a spark of light in front of him.

The man he had been speaking to through letters, Mikhail, was there at a table; and he was looking at him.

It was as if he were propelled forward. With a few steps, he was in front of Mikhail. Though Jaxon had sensed his kindness through his letters, nothing had prepared him for seeing Mikhail in the flesh. Jaxon’s heart beat with something he could not name at first, so foreign it seemed within him. However, after a few moments, he could put a name to that emotion: Hope.

He smiled at Mikhail and said the only word that came to mind: “Hello.”

“Hello.” Mikhail responded

As Jaxon looked into Mikhail’s blue and grey eyes, the hope within him grew brighter. The light inside of him matched the light that shone from Mikhal’s eyes, and that light came from inside of him.

There are those that said on that day in the small village of Inglewood Hamlet, the sky was filled with stars. Others said that surely a great and powerful witch or sorcerer had cast a spell so large it could be seen miles away. Even more said that they saw a bright light emanating from the pub that filled them with every happy memory they had ever experienced.

There was one woman who knew what had happened, however. She looked out from the clouds at the light shining below and knew that the light meant that her son had fallen in love, so pure and powerful was the light.

Or, so the story goes…

The World of the Pen – A Poem

I don’t see thetumblr_lsdqgjds8x1qcjnaio1_500_large

world in the same

way others do. In

my world, there are

dragons flying overhead, soaring

through the clouds. In

my world, there are

flowers and plants that

talk to you as

you walk along the

path. Sometimes, they sing.

In my world, there

are fair folk. Some

are kind, helping you

along on your path,

showing you the right

way. Others would lead

you astray, into the

deadly swamps that await

those who have lost

all hope. Yet, there

are even more strange

sights to see, unicorns

and griffins, ogres and

trolls, battling it out

over something you have

said or didn’t say.

There are darker corners

that are full of

despicable people capable of

the darkest of deeds.

However, for every person

of darkness, there is

one of light so

pure and so complete

that it never fails

to shine in the

darkest corners of my

world, for good must

always triumph over

evil. I stop for a

moment on the path

that I’ve been walking

upon when my Prince

comes up behind me

and wraps his arms

around me in an

embrace. He is warm

and wonderful, full of

the kind of light

that shines so brightly.

“What are you writing?”

He asks. I answer

as truthfully as possible.

“I’m not sure yet.”

His scent envelopes me.

“I can’t wait to read it.”

I carry a smile within

me as he walks

away and I wield

my pen, mightier than

the sword, and wait

for the story that

wants to be set

free.

I Wish… – A Poem

imagesAs I was walking home,

I saw a man with

the bluest eyes. They were

a dark and vibrant blue,

the colour of a sky after

a storm has cleared.

I had a flash from

my youth, a wish to be

other than I was,

to not look as I did.

I had always wanted

blond hair and blue eyes.

For reasons unknown to me,

this was what I identified

as beautiful. As I

walked away from the

blue eyed man,

I whispered over and over:

“I wish, I wish, I wish….”

I stopped there, however.

What did I wish exactly?

Though my life was not

what I thought it would be,

I was happy.

Though I did not look

like everyone else,

I loved myself,

every part of me,

even my imperfections.

If I changed one iota

of who I was,

or what I looked like,

I would not be on

the path I was on today.

My life would be

different than it was now.

It wouldn’t be the life

that I was living

but someone else’s.

I was finally happy

inside my own skin

and content with the life

that I’ve been given.

So instead, I simply said

“I wish…”

and left it at that.

For to wish for something

is to invite the possibility

of magic

into your life.

As I walked home,

the air around me began

to sparkle and shine

and I knew that

I was already

magical.