Number-one bestselling author
I could hear her
before she became visible.
The song she was singing
stretched her voice out before her
so that it was the first thing
about her that I became aware of.
Notes of song rang out into
the cool air and, from where I was,
I could see them dancing with her breath,
as if celebrating being free.
A dog barked and she came into view,
her face bathed in the sun.
The dog walked in front of her
and would look back at her
as she sang, the notes pure and whole.
I was struck by how happy she looked,
as if the light of the sun that shone so brightly
was mirrored from within her.
Her song was part of the light
that she gave to the world.
I stood there watching her as she sang.
It seemed to be a private moment,
a woman with her dog and her voice
singing out in front of her.
I had never heard opera sung so beautifully.
In that moment, I closed my eyes for a second
and let her voice take me
on a journey that was filled with
such emotiosn that I could only
let them flow through me.
In her song, there was a torment of the spirit
but I could hear a hope
that shone as brightly as the sun upon my face.
As I stood there, I reflected
that this was what we were all going through,
trying to find the joy in the darkness.
I opened my eyes to see
that she had stopped walking.
She faced me, this woman with
a song for the heavens.
In that moment, I knew
that she was singing for me.
She stood across the street,
tears sliding from her eyes
yet a brightness on her face
as she sang. She saw me looking
and she bowed her head.
I understood then that this song,
her voice, it was my gift
because I was the only person
who could hear her song.
When she walked onward,
her dog walking joyfully ahead of her
despite the sadness that was contained
in her voice, she left something with me.
Inside of me,
there was a small seed of light.
If I closed my eyes,
I could hear her song within me.
It filled me with a sadness that had no name
and a joy that shone as brightly
as a flame in the dark.
The forest has changed over time.
It’s been years since
I have been so deep into the trees
and though the leaves still whisper
in the same way that they always did.
They are not tar black like they were before,
but dark green. I stand in the trees
and I wonder how I can find myself here
after so long. I look around at the trees,
remnants of tar and blood they took from me
littering the forest floor. I look into the leaves,
into the depth of the trees,
waiting to hear the creatures that dwelled within.
All I can hear is silence
underneath the sound of my breathing
and the beating of my heart.
I realize that I had never really left it behind,
that the dark forest was always there.
No matter how much I try to outrun it,
or deny its existence,
The dark forest is always within me.
Rather than be frightened by the trees,
I reach out to touch the leaves.
The trees all around me let out a sound
very much like a sigh of longing.
I feel it within me, as if I am accepting
a part of myself that I had shunned
when all it wanted was some kind of affection.
Looking at the forest around me,
I can see blood and shadow,
growth and light,
all held within a gorgeous balance
of air, earth and soil and light.
I expect to hear the sounds of ghosts,
waiting to pull me deeper into the trees,
but all I can hear
are the songs of birds
as they call to me and if I stop to listen,
I can almost make out what they
are trying to say.
Walking forward,
I let my hands reach out on either side
of myself and touch the leaves
and I can feel that touch within myself.
When I get to the border of the forest,
knowing that this will not be goodbye.
I’m okay with that and I’m no longer afraid
of what waits within.
Voting is now live!
Make sure to vote for me and my book for the 2022 Ottawa Awards!
Go here: https://facesmag.ca/awards/#/gallery?group=402752
I’m under Author of the Year: Jamieson Wolf
and Book of the Year: Beyond the Stone
Voting runs from January 6th until January 31st, 2022 and winners are announced on January 31st!
I’d really appreciate your vote!
How awesome is this?
I’m a nominee for the Faces Ottawa 2022 Awards! I know, right?
Every year, Faces Magazine runs an awards ceremony to celebrate the biggest and brightest in Ottawa!
I’ve been nominated for Best Book of the Year (Beyond the Stone) and Best Author of the Year. Voting begins on January 6th
You can find out more here: https://facesmag.ca/awards/#//
This is an awesome way to start the week! More news as it comes, but get ready to vote on January 6th 2022!
Books saved me in 2021. I don’t think I’m the only one who would say this. While it took me longer to read books this year, the books I did read were my salvation during a tumultuous time. The books that I read were a lifeline that offered me comfort, adventure and escape and I didn’t have to leave the comfort of my home.
The year was full of so many good reads, too many for me to get to, but these are the ones that stood out for me in 2021. They run the gambit from romantic to adventure, fantasy to horror. Each one of them left me moved in some way and quite often when I finished them, I just sat there trying to hold on to the words I had just read, and I felt enriched by them.
Just like every year that I’ve done this, the books on my Best Books list have to have been published in 2021. These are the books that stood out for me out of the forty-five books or so that I’ve read. I hope you enjoy discovering them as much as I enjoyed reading them.
Any Way the Wind Blows by Rainbow Rowell
All I can say about this book is WOW. As the third in the Simon Snow trilogy, Any Way the Wind Blows was everything I could have hoped for in every way. It was compulsively readable and the story just pulled me along for an incredible ride. I love how everything in all three of the books led up to the ending of Any Way the Wind Blows and that everything I went through with Simon was part of this incredible journey. This was my favourite book of the year and so worth the wait.
Clare at Sixteen by Don Roff
Everything about this book was such a delightful surprise. A sixteen-year-old girl who is a serial killer? Sounds kind of gimmicky but this novel surprised me with its depth, its fantastic characters and a killer (ha!) plot that doesn’t go anywhere where I thought it would. I thought that a novel about a serial killer kid would be a fun read and that was it. I didn’t expect to be moved by it and to be left waiting for the next one with glee. Clare is one of my favourite characters ever created and I would hate to piss her off. This novel left me enraptured!
A Postcard from Paris by Alex Brown and A Cozy Christmas at Bridget’s Bicycle Café by Alex Brown
I couldn’t possibly choose between the two books that Alex Brown gave us in 2021. I love her work so much as it goes beyond what chick lit is normally considered to be. What I love about her books is that she pulls you in with her fabulous characters and by the end I find myself rooting for them to find their joy and find where they belong. In one story, a journey to a new country leads a woman to discover what she really wants in life. In the other, a woman’s journey to a place she used to know helps her find herself. In both stories, we’re given characters that feel like real people, so much so that they feel like friends in the end.
Juniper Wiles by Charles de Lint
It was so good to be back in Newford. I hadn’t realized how much I missed it and the characters that this city held. Jilly Coppercorn led me on a journey that filled me with so much joy and I felt like I was reclaiming a part of myself that I had left behind years ago when I read the last Newford book. There is magic in this novel of course but there is so much heart and characters that are friends from long ago and new ones that also become friends. I love the fact that this novel could have been just any story set in Newford and I would have been happy, but it’s a story that added to the mystery and the fabric of the city. I was thrilled to be back in Newford and this time I was ready to say goodbye.
Chasing the Boogeyman by Richard Chizmar
I had no idea what to expect when I opened this book, but it felt like so much more than a book. It was a story that I lived as I read it. It’s part autobiography, part mystery, part true, part not so true and I was left wondering where the truth ended and where thee real began. I’ve never read anything like this book and it thrilled me in so many ways. I finished it off in three days and it’s already back on my to be read pile so that I can give it another go. It’s horror at its finest and was an absolute joy to read. I was pulled into this mystery and left wanting to keep the lights on as I read into the night. With characters that leap off the page and feel so real, this was a story that I didn’t just read; I lived this book.
Hell Bound by Marie Bilodeau and Princess of Light by Marie Bilodeau
Once again, it was impossible to choose between these two novels. They are both so different but they are both incredible. In one, we are given the third book in a series featuring Tira Misu, badass and wielder of darkness. In the other, the first in a trilogy and we are given the Princess Cassara, unwilling to just merely accept the life she is supposed to lead. In love the journey of growth that both of these characters will go on. They are both so drastically different books, but both are filled with a light and a heart that beats on the pages of the story. Both of these stories moved me and I found myself cheering both Tira and Cassara on as they found themselves and where they belonged.
The Oracle Creator by Steven Bright
What a brilliant book! I’ve been wanting to make my own oracle/tarot deck for years and this book is full of so much knowledge. Steven Bright brings you through the whole process and the whole book acts like a workbook of sorts so that you can take the idea that you have for your deck and give it focus. Even better, Bright gives you the tools you need to make your dream a reality. I’ve been through the book once already and am now on my second read through and I’m making notes. 2022 will hopefully see my dream become a reality. Thanks Steven, I couldn’t be happier with The Oracle Creator!
Yours Cruelly, Elvira: Memoirs of the Mistress of the Dark by Cassandra Peterson
As a child of the eighties, I fell in love with Elvira. After reading this book, I fell in love with her a little bit more. I loved the journey that Peterson takes us on and it goes so much deeper than a mistress of the macabre. We’re given the journey of her life and it’s a wonderful one. Peterson is so much more than a big pair of boobs, she is a woman who has lived a life that few of us can even dream about and I loved following along with her journey towards ultimately finding herself. As I read about her life in Hollywood and the wins and losses she had to endure, it is told with the candor and honesty that you’d expect from Peterson and Elvira herself. I loved reading about the journey that the character and the actress went on and it just made me want to delve right back into everything Elvira. A fabulous, glitzy, wonderful read.
White Lightning by Melissa Yi
I love Melissa Yi’s books. They always go beyond a typical mystery plot. When she goes off on what she hopes will be a romantic getaway, Hope Sze finds herself embroiled in a plot involving prohibition, a convention and bones that once belonged to a human being, this is one incredible mystery. I love how nothing is as it seems and every time, I think I have it all figured out, Yi tips the story on its side and takes it to places I never dreamed possible but by the end, I am wondering why I didn’t think of that in the first place. Yi gives us a mystery that forced me to confront a villain that is so meticulous that it gave me chills. Yi has given a mystery that made me laugh out loud and left me actually frightened for Hope and the other characters in this incredible book. I love the Hope Sze mysteries by Melissa Yi, they always go beyond what I think is possible and leave me wanting more.
These were my favourite reads of 2021! I can’t wait to see what 2022 will bring and can’t wait to get reading!