Jamieson Wolf
Number-one bestselling author
Sharing Scars – A Poem
We sat together comparing our scars.
Some of them had been caused
by others and some we had made ourselves.
Many of them were the same
except for several of mine.
He had no scars along his skin to match them.
“It’s because you’ve lived longer,”
he told me, a look of wisdom
so out of place in his young face.
He lay in a bed, surrounded by the dark.
I could hear the rustle of leaves
that surrounded us but I did not
see any trees. I did not feel the wind
that made them rustle but he seemed
to take comfort from the sound
that the invisible trees made around us.
“You have come so far,”
he said to me.
“Farther than I thought I would go.”
He paused then and looked around
at the trees which I could no longer see.
“I thought I would die here. I’m glad we didn’t.”
It’s then that I notice something about his face.
There are two scars that run underneath his nose.
I reach up and touch the same scars on my face.
I really look at him for the first time
and I can see my face looking back at me,
albeit a younger face than I carry now.
He nods, pleased that I have finally realized
the truth and I know that those leaves
are within me still, though I no longer
feel fear when I hear the whisper of the leaves,
not like I did then. I have grown
beyond the fear of that time.
He stands and I stand with him.
I wonder how long I have been
carrying him within me and the fear
that filled me during this time.
“You don’t need me anymore,”
he says to me. He offers me a smile
and I can see light within it,
as if he can finally be free.
When he leaves the room,
I look around at what had held my fear,
this space where I lost myself
but planted a seed so that I could grow
beyond what I thought possible.
When I leave the room,
it is with the knowledge that I will not return.
I am not afraid anymore.
The Fifth Stage – A Poem
I was in denial for weeks.
I kept trying to pretend
everything was okay,
that I was all right
but I was lying to myself
and to those around me
who could see through
my façade because
they knew me so well.
Never very far under
the surface of my skin,
I could feel the anger
burning through all of me.
I was furious with the world
and at the way my story
was unfolding, the lack
of control that I had
over my own body.
I would look up
at the ceiling at night
and imagined that
I could see the stars.
Thoughts kept running
around in my head
and I would make
bargains with myself,
with a higher power.
I would promise to be kinder
because I had not been kind enough.
I would promise to give more
of myself to others
because I had not given enough.
I would promise to be more.
just more if it would bring
and ending to my plight.
Nothing happened. I remained
on the same path,
the same plight within my skin.
I would look at myself
in the mirror
and I swore that I could see
the disease that resided
within me, and that filled me
with a flood of water
that seemed never to end.
The dark forest called to me,
its leaves whispering
during the night.
It was only when I began
to burst into tears at random moments
that I realized I was depressed.
The dark forest was growing
stronger, the leaves more visible
with each passing day.
I looked at those leaves,
the trees that I knew so well
and I knew that I wanted
something different,
that I wanted to tell
a different kind of story.
I needed to take control
of how the pages were turned.
I felt a soft breeze
ripple over my skin
when I had that thought.
I decided that I would not fight,
that whatever happened
would happen anyways.
I had a choice and I chose
to accept the way my path
was full of rocks and cliff edges.
I had gotten past those roadblocks.
before and each time I was able
to move past one,
I learned something about myself.
This time, I knew that
the journey would be
full of light of darkness,
the choice was mine
to make. I would have to
take things one step
at a time and I wondered
what this journey
would teach me.
Artificial Divide – AVAILABLE NOW!
I’m thrilled that Artificial Divide is out now!
It’s an anthology of short stories written by blind and visually impaired authors and each story is told with blind or visually impaired people as the protagonist. It’s a very powerful own voices anthology and I’m so honoured to have a short story included within it.
My short story in the anthology is called The Blood Trees. My multiple sclerosis sometimes causes temporary blindness where things are blurry or unclear. It happens a lot in the evenings when my body is tired or I am suffering from fatigue. I wanted to write about that and also about the depression that I went through when I was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis. The Blood Trees was the result.
Here’s a bit about the anthology:
Step into a world of rogue screen readers, Braille in fantasy worlds, a friend meeting an acquaintance after several years, and more.
This #OwnVoices anthology features fiction by Blind and visually impaired authors showing readers how they thrive, hurt, get revenge, outsmart bullies, or go on epic adventures. Artificial Divide is an own-voices story collection that captures the many layers of Blindness and, for once, puts visually impaired protagonists in the driver’s seat, letting us glimpse their lives.
When we think about it, we’re not really divided.
You can get your copy at all book sellers or find it online at the following places:
I hope you enjoy the book and all the wonderful stories contained within.
Beyond the Stone – AVAILABLE NOW!
I’m so excited!
My new novel Beyond the Stone is out now from Renaissance Press! I’m so thrilled for all of you to be able to read this book!
I wanted to write something different and when I sat down to write Beyond the Stone, I had no idea what that would be, but I knew that it would be set in a dystopian future where magic had come out in the open. As the story took shape, I fell in love with Bane, the supernatural who is trying to figure out who he is and Jackson, the mortal who already knows.
As the world began to take shape around Bane and Jackson, Eliza, Madison and Myko, I was curious on how the world was taking shape and Bane’s position within it. I wanted to tell his story and take a deep look at the magic it held. A multitude of magical races began to take shape with this dark world as their playground.
I wanted to write about what it was like to find love as a disabled man and take a look at the story of a man who had difficulty with loving himself because of his disability.
Over the coming days, there will be more information about the world and the people that live within the Clocktower series. I hope you enjoy the first venture into this world and have as much fun reading it as I did writing it.
Here’s a bit about the book:
After a schism renders the world unrecognizable, Magic comes out into the open.
Bane is a Supernatural who works for the Clocktower, the organization that is supposed to protect mortals from themselves. Jackson is able to teleport long distances and is also a clairvoyant, something that no mortal should be able to do. That’s the least of their troubles, however. Sparks fly when they meet, even if relationships between mortals and Supernaturals are frowned upon.
When they learn that the Clocktower is keeping mortals and Supernaturals prisoner, Bane knows that they will have to go against the Clocktower in order to break them free… but will they break themselves in the process?
Get your copy of Beyond the Stone at your favourite book seller, but here are a few links just in case you need them:
I do hope you enjoy this tale as Bane tries to find himself. If you do read it, please review it online. Every review helps! Check out the awesome trailer below!
After the schism, magic came out into the open. Bane protects the mortals from magic…but who will protect Bane from himself?
The Mountain and the Flow – A Poem
I’ve been here before.
The mountain looms in front of me
and I can see the jagged rocks,
the outcropping of edges and crevices,
rockfaces that hold challenges
that I have yet to face.
I stand before the mountain,
awed by its size,
fearful of the journey ahead of me.
From the top of the mountain,
a flow of water slides
down the rockface,
finding a path through a terrain
that has not been kind to me.
I marvel at how the flow of my emotions
have found a path so easily
within the rocks of the mountain
when I must struggle to find my way.
I stare upwards and the sun glints
off of the rockface
and I have to shield my eyes.
Looking at the mountain,
I feel a sense of determination
run through me and I wonder
if that emotion is reflected
in the flow of water
coming down from the mountain.
I watch as an eagle flies
in the blue sky above me and,
for a moment,
I can see myself standing on top
of this mountain, so much like
all the other rock faces
that I’ve had to climb before.
I know that eventually I
will reach the top
of this mountain, too.
I’ve got this, I think.
I’ve done this before
and I will do this again.
I reach forward
and let the flow of water
run over my fingers
and listen to what it
has to tell me.
Buy Little Yellow Magnet from Amazon and Kobo!
Jamieson Wolf has written a compelling story about navigating multiple sclerosis and cerebral palsy. His story will touch your heart, make you cry, then laugh, and inspire you. A touching memoir with a bit of magic…and tarot! ~ Theresa Reed, author of The Tarot Coloring Book
Jamieson Wolf 