Number-one bestselling author
unable to speak.
It would look
at other people
in love and
wonder what they
were saying to
each other without
speaking. What kind
of unknown language
passed between them?
I despaired of
ever finding someone
who loved me
deeply enough to
speak without speaking,
to touch my
heart with a
simple caress. That
changed when I
met you. The
love between us
grew slowly, starting
as a seed
that was planted
in my heart
the moment we
first kissed. It
was nurtured with
every endearment and
each caress. When
the flower bloomed,
filling me completely,
I heard a
soft buzzing, felt
a throb of
vibration as my
heart began to
respond to yours.
Now, when you
touched me, it
was like you
touched my heart.
Now when you
spoke to me,
it was as
if you spoke
to my soul.
At first, I
was terrified. What
was this unknown
language? What did
it all mean?
You took my
face in your
hands and looked
right into me.
“Don’t be afraid.”
You said to
me. At those
words, my fear
fell away and
a series of
words I had
not known began
to show themselves
appearing as if
something was rubbed
away and the
words were there
the entire time.
All they needed
was someone to
help me see
them. Now when
you look at
me, the words
from the unknown
language become known
all over again.
All it took
was your love
to set the
words, and myself,
free.
getting my coffee
this morning, I
noticed the barista
was wearing a
locket. Looking closer,
I read the
word “Slytherin” in
a flowing script.
Underneath, the serpent
that represented the
house was curled,
as if lying
in wait. I
pointed to it.
“Where did you get that?”
She looked at
me with shrewd
eyes as if
taking stock of
my worth. She
nodded, assessing me
as one who
was completely worthy.
“I got it at Comicon, but I’m sure there is an Etsy shop.”
I held up
my right wrist
and showed her
the scar that
was tattooed there.
She reached out
to touch it.
“Is it a real tattoo?”
I nodded, smiling.
Like recognizes like.
“What house are you in? Did you get sorted on Pottermore?”
I nodded, smiling.
“I was one of the first million people allowed to access the site.”
“So what house?”
“I got sorted into Ravenclaw, but I think I belong in Gryffindor.”
“Oh, no, you have to trust the Sorting Hat. It knows.”
“But I have the scar…”
She gave it
another hungry look.
“That’s a symbol for the whole series. It’s Harry’s story, right? But if the Sorting Hat and JK Rowling put you in Ravenclaw, that’s where you belong.”
I must have
looked put out
so she sang:
“Or yet in wise old Ravenclaw, if you’ve a ready mind, where those of wit and learning, will always find their kind.”
I recognized the
song. It’s what
the Sorting Hat
first sung when
Harry was sorted.
She looked at
me with a
strong, searching look.
“Are you wise? Do you crave knowledge? Are you drawn to air? That’s the element associated with Ravenclaw, you know.”
Something occurred to
me and I
pointed to the
necklace she wore.
“Were you sorted into Slytherin?”
I asked her.
She nodded, a
spark lighting up
her eyes. They
looked as if
they were filled
with glitter magic.
“Yes, I was. I wasn’t happy about it at first, I wanted Gryffindor, everyone does. But we’re all parts of the same house, you know. However, it’s our differences that make us strong.”
I wasn’t sure
if she was
referring to Harry
Potter, or something
deeper than that.
I took my
coffee and bade
her a nice
day. She put
her hand out,
catching my wrist.
“Trust in the Sorting Hat. It knows where you belong. We all have to belong somewhere.”
I nodded and
made my way
to work. I
looked online for
a Ravenclaw necklace.
My acceptance of
my house within
the world of
Harry Potter was
a small thing,
but at the
thought of stretching
my wings like
an eagle, and
soaring into the
air, my heart
soared with it
and I knew
where I belonged.
morning with words
etched into my
skin. I tried to
read them in
mirror, but the
writing was backwards.
My friends noticed
the words and
asked why I
had tattooed myself
with just a
fraction of a
sentence. I woke
the next morning
to find the
words had doubled
on my skin,
snaking down the
inside of my
arm. I went
to the doctors
and they asked
why I had
marked myself with
words. They didn’t
understand when I
told them the
words had just
appeared there on
their own. They
sent me home
with a mild
sedative. When I
woke on the
third morning, I
found that both
my arms were
now covered in
looping black words.
I tried to
read them, attempted
to make sense
of what they
said, but I
could not see
all of the
words. Looking in
the mirror, I
saw they had
started to appear
along the back
of my neck.
My mother was
the one who
explained it to
me. She read
the words, running
her fingers along
some of them,
turning my arms
in order to
read others. She
looked at me.
“Don’t you recognize this?”
I shook my head
no. I shrugged.
“I haven’t been able to see all of them to read them. What does it say?”
“You should know. You wrote them.”
I was shocked.
“What do you mean?”
She pointed to
the words that
ran along the
inside of my
arm, then ran
her fingers along.
“As the cards flew from my grasp, I knew I had made the right decision. I was the Broken Man no longer.”
She paused for
breath, and to
point to another
set of words.
“And this here? These say: I had let a piece of my past go and looked forward to what the future would bring.”
I shook my head,
not knowing what
to say. My
mother took my
hands and held
them in hers.
“Your life is a living poem. A wonderful, exciting, awesome living poem.”
I wondered at
her words, at
what they meant.
What the words
on my skin
meant. She could
see my confusion.
“You put so much of yourself in your words, it is only natural that they will mark you even as you mark the page. Do not be afraid of them.”
“How do I get the words out of my skin?”
She looked at
me with a
half smile and
that wise look
she got in
her eyes, deep
and somehow comforting.
“Write. More words will come and you will always be marked by them, but you are a living poem. It has always been this way.”
I nodded and
pulled a piece
of paper towards
me. I put my
hand down on
the paper and
watched as the words
on my skin
began to slip
and slide off
of it. I
looked at the
page to see
what they had
to say.
back from the
coffee shop, drinks
in hand, when
I saw him.
I gestured to
her and made
sure she had
seen. I pointed
to him, saying
That’s my ex-husband.
It was the
first time I had
seen him in
six years. Later,
I wondered at
his appearance.
He was but
the latest in
a long line
of people from
my past that
I had seen
recently. I had
come across people
I used to know,
ex-boyfriends, ex-friends, ex-lovers.
I was wondering
at my lack
of a reaction,
at the absence
of anger that
I felt, that
had carried with
me for so
long. I had
worn my his
betrayal as if
it were a
hair shirt, or
a stone around
my neck. Instead
of reacting in
anger, I felt
oddly buoyant and
light. I walked
over to her
and asked her:
Why aren’t I reacting more? If this were last year, seeing him would have depressed me for the day. I’ve seen all these people from my past and they aren’t affecting me as I thought they would if I ever saw them again.
I paused for
breath and for
what I really
wanted to ask.
What gives?
She looked at
me with that
sage look in
her eyes that
she had and
smiled at me.
You were ready.
She said simply.
You’re a lot better now then you were. You’ve healed. You’re a different person now. You’re on the right path and you’re going where you need to. You wouldn’t be seeing them otherwise.
I nodded and
thought of all
the emotions that
these people had
caused me, all
the hurt, depression,
sadness, angst, rage,
despair and malaise.
I realised that
what I was
feeling right then
and there was
simple, unequivocal happiness.
I let go
of the pain,
of the heartache,
of the self-degradation,
and stopped judging
myself by how
other people from
my past had
seen me. All
that there was
now is me
as I chose
to be and
the emotion of
happiness. I choose
to be happy.
All the rest
is just stardust
and the possibilities
of the future.